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I actually went on a date yesterday. You know, it was the kind of date that the guy actually opens the doors for you and pays for the meal. Yeah, that kind of date. It was nice. The guy who I will call "S" was super sweet, mature, didn't cuss, great dad, hard worker, has his own car, clean teeth, smelled great, handsome and was able to carry a great conversation with me. Here are my concerns. S is a BIG guy...and when I say big I mean 6'2 and probably close to 400 pounds. Its funny though how a guy can be that big but still be handsome but when a gal is that big its just unacceptable.
Let me explain myself. I have been over three hundred pounds and only 5'6 so its pretty much the same as being 6'2 and 400 pounds. I have no right to say to this very sweet man that I don't want to date him because of his weight. But I'm having some reservations about him. He isn't trying to loose weight at all right now, and he is already suffering from sleep apnea and sever snoring because of his weight. Being over weight like that can KILL you eventually, not to mention that being that overweight makes you grow old very fast. Ive worked so hard to NOT be that big because I don't want to grow old fast and I don't want to be dependant on a sleep machine because I stop breathing in the middle of the night because I'm to fat to breath on my own.
Its almost been a year that I have been working on my weight loss. Its been a hard road, and Ive worked really hard at it. Its a really hard decision for me to date someone who is where I was almost a year ago and isn't ready to make changes. I want to be able to do things, be young, run, hike mountains, ride bikes, live, chase my kids...and do all that while being healthy and skinny. I cant share those things with a person who is 400 pounds.
OK lay it on me gals...am I being selfish? I am going to go out with S again, and I probably will have a talk with him about my concerns and let him know that we cant be in a serious relationship because of my concerns....but I feel horrible like I'm being mean.
What do you think?
Disclaimer:
When I originally made the title for this post "Your to fat" I did it because I have been told before (by a man that I was dating) that I was to fat to date him. He told me that he would see me but not "officially" because essentially I was "to fat" for him. I didn't do it to hurt or call my date this weekend (S) fat. Sheesh!! I think he reads my blog and I didn't realize that until after I posted this.